Why I’m (still) single

Reasons that may or may not be valid

Michael Freer
4 min readMay 1, 2024
Photo by call me hangry 🇫🇷 on Unsplash

To give context, when writing this I was 37 and single, of course.

The usual question is “Are you married yet?”. Then they ‘downgrade’ it to whether I have a girlfriend. Some add on “or partner”, “or boyfriend”, just to cover all the potentials.

I say no. Some then ask my age, tell me I’m still young and I have time. Thankfully.

They tell me they could line me up with someone. I laugh, and say sure, and then they send me a photo or a number or something. I ask a few questions and sometimes they change their mind and retract the offer. This could be because they realise that one of us could probably destabilise the other, or something like that.

Normally the people asking this question are my age or older, but I was surprised the other day when a member of the youth club I run asked me. Suddenly the tone was different, and the response too, obviously.

He said it was a private question and I didn’t have to answer if I didn’t want to. But I know teens hate being swatted away, and prefer to get the same honesty we demand from them, so I gave him a shorter version and age appropriate one of the below.

Get close, get hurt



Michael Freer

Social enterprise enthusiast, avid traveller and fiction writer. www.ensoco.co.uk